Late last week, Twitter (X) started to buzz over a video that has lingered on the hearts and minds of many of us but might be unremarkable to others.
The video shows young girls in leotards lined up in a row at what appears to be a gymnastics tournament. They are following order, remaining as still as possible while eagerly awaiting a medal they have earned. Some of the girls shift their weight from one foot to the next as they try to keep a straight line while a photographer takes photos. One girl sneaks a wave - likely to a loved one in the crowd.
A woman begins to hand out medals to each child starting from the far left side of the row, while making her way to the right. The woman places a medal over each girl’s head that decorates their necks with a thick red ribbon. They instinctively look down at the prize, adjust their hair, and fix their shoulders to ensure it’s centre and visible for all to see.
The woman appears to skip over one little girl in the middle and moves on to decorate her peers who fill out the rest of the row. At first watch, you might think that this was an innocent error and she’ll circle back but it doesn’t happen. The child who was skipped over stands out. She is the only Black girl and now the only one without a medal. She looks around. She’s confused. I’m confused. There must be a mistake but mistakes are corrected. Her eyes are so familiar and communicate what is at times impossible to articulate.
She’s just like the other girls in the row. Maybe she begged her parents to put her in gymnastics. I bet there were early morning practices where she likely earned some bruises as she mastered the beam but it didn’t hurt that much because she laughed it off with her friends who were put through the same drills. She is the same but she is the only Black girl in the row.
When this video made its rounds people from all backgrounds remarked on the cruelty - “this is racism” many pointed out. I noticed a trend amongst X users who also appear to be Black and retweeted the video. They often mentioned how it was incredibly hard to watch. I feel the same way.
It’s too easy to wrap this up in a neat package and decide it’s painful because it’s a racist situation and that we all agree racism is bad, right? Maybe? I hope so.
Let’s unravel why those of us, who were once that little girl, felt our chests tighten when we watched the recording. My eyes blinked quicker than usual to stave off tears. I don’t know this little Black girl or anyone else in the video. I’m a grown woman here in Calgary, Alberta, she’s a child participating in a pastime all the way in Dublin, Ireland but please believe me when I say I know her.
It’s a specific experience to be reminded how visible you are in situations when there should be no reason why you aren’t simply a teammate, a classmate, or a colleague. They tell you to come and join. The request might even be forceful because they’re trying to follow a mandate. Diversity is important - didn’t you see the statement on the website?
You’ll be a part of the team, they say. You sign up, pay the fee, and accept the offer because it’s everything you’re looking for. You give yourself a pep talk in the mirror on the first day. Get ready, you’re entering a space where you will be judged but it will finally be on data that is separate from your identity. You need to practice and train because all that matters is the score the judges will give you. You need to study even harder than the others who aren’t nearly as smart as you are. You’ll know it was enough once your teacher gives you a grade based on the facts presented in the assignment. Get to the office early, stay late, and outwork everyone around you - how else will they know how talented you are. The results will speak for themselves and you’ll be undeniable when it’s time for a promotion.
On a good day, I say this is a misguided fable we’re told instead of the outright lie it can be if you choose to ignore these insidious moments. They are moments that blend into the day to day routine and feel somewhat ordinary when you aren’t the target.
We now know the situation depicted in the video took place at a GymStart event in March 2022. The parents of the young gymnast filed a complaint that called out racist behaviour by the official tasked with handing out the medals. When the official was informed of the complaint, she said it was an “honest error” and apologized to the family. Some have criticized the way Gymnastics Ireland has handled the situation, reducing it to a personal issue as opposed to something that should be addressed across the sport in Ireland.
When you're a child, you’re taught to say sorry when you do something wrong and accept an apology from others when they do something to you. It is meant to wipe the slate clean. But that’s not how it works in reality.
We don’t know exactly what happened after the video cuts off but I imagine the girls leave the mat. They get dressed in their warm up attire and eventually connect with the guardians who brought them to the event. For most of the athletes and the audience it is a moment that will be logged with many others just like it. It might even be forgotten. After all, it’s just gymnastics, the children are meant to have fun, it was just a participation medal, it doesn’t actually matter.
But to that Black gymnast it stopped being a fun activity that doesn’t matter the moment she wasn’t seen as the little girl that she is. The mark on her memory and soul was tattooed the moment she was made to look left, then look right with concern to sort out why she was being left out.
Little girls grow up. Gymnastic officials have lives and families. Everyone needs to work.
Our hearts sank when we watched the video because the participation medal represents the way we show up. It’s the looks and comments that we swallow. It’s the way we seek out more education than necessary to be undeniable. The medal is meant to soothe the pain when you’re invisible in a boardroom. There is no question that you’ve earned that medal but the pain that never leaves is when you realize there are people who can’t help themselves from taking it away, even for just a moment, when the power is in their hands.
It’s never just gymnastics.